Thursday, March 29, 2007

And another five

Things for which I am thankful...

1. The fact that my boss didn't call into work today so I didn't have to waste 30 minutes on the phone listening to him tell me to do things I already did three weeks ago and have him think out loud over the phone to me saying things like, "Uh...yeah, um....hm....I don't remember what I was going to say." REALLY?

2. Special K Breakfast Bars. Those things are CRAAAAAZY tasty. As in, Fried Chicken crazy tasty. But they don't taste like fried chicken. They tast completely different. Just really good.

3. My coworkers who make my job and life a little less boring and a little more tolerable.

4. People that don't drive stupidly. Like not trying to figure out if they can turn right on a green light. Those people that don't waste my time being stupid kinda rock.

5. People that speak well. Then I don't have to obsessively correct their grammar. And their stupidity. "That flashlight is broke. I had came to pick you up. I had went to find you." I would like to thank all the people out there who do not speak like this.

This is all for today. Pretty sure it's only day three and I'm scraping the bottom of the barrel.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

5 more things

1. Naps. Being THIS tired all day, I definitely deserve the second best thing God ever invented. I bet you're wondering what the best thing is, huh? Napping, idiots.

2. Loralee. 'Cause she makes me laugh my guts out and if I lived in Logan, I'd arrange it so I could live next door to her so I could bother her night and day.

3. Rain. Especially on tired days where you want to take naps.

4. "Criminal Minds". No, not actual criminal minds. That's just sick. I mean the show. 'Cause it's the best show ever and it's on tonight.

5. My new resolution to start running this spring and summer, because after getting small amounts of exercise I've found it really helps physically and mentally. And I think I might actually stick to it this year.

And no, Loralee...Mitt Romney will never make it into any of my Top Five lists...you sick little sadist.

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

New Leaf

After the past few weeks of feeling emotionally, mentally and spiritually drained, and after one too many afternoons of lamenting the situations that make up my life... I have made a decision to turn over a new leaf.

As I was sitting in this little coffin of a room, tap-tap-tapping away on my computer, obsessing over things that I can neither control nor fix, lamenting the sad, sad situation which is my job search, wondering if I will be left to rot in this hellish little town with six cats and the charming little title of "Old Aunt Sue" or "Crazy Cat Lady"... it occurred to me.

I complain and whine and get frustrated and feel sorry for myself and obsess and worry and try to please other people WAY TOO MUCH. I mean...seriously...get over myself...who do I think I am?

SO...here's the new plan...each day I have to list five things which I am thankful for or tell five good things about my day. I'm going to practice being positive. And I'm hoping...having a thankful heart will help me to see things rightly and I will be able to pull myself out of this rut I currently find myself in.

Here goes.

1. Today, it is BEAUTIFULLY sunny and warm and just plain gorgeous. It is awesome.

2. Today, I received six job offers. Okay, I didn't, but a little positive confession never killed anyone. But I AM thankful that I currently HAVE a job where I can pay all of my bills.

3. I have awesome friends, family, boy and coworkers. Awesome. Oh...and awesome blog buddies too. And they never, ever irritate me or make me want to smack them or shove their faces in. (Another positive confession there in case you couldn't tell.)

4. I am not sick. Not anywhere. No aches, no pains, no 24 hour flu bug, no sniffles, nothing. Go Vitamin C.

5. I have a birthday coming up. It's a birthday. I'm supposed to celebrate it. So, I'm going to.

Know what's funny? That was actually a little bit painful. It's so much easier to whine, complain and moan. But no. I'm going to work on that. Seriously. I'm going to be so positive, I'm going to be like your own personal Pollyanna. It's going to irritate the crud out of you people.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Oh. My. Goodness.

I love Blogger.

God bless Blogger.

People at Blogger are the best people in the world.

EVER.

They're even better than Mormons.

Why?

Because they...

UNDELETED MY OLD BLOG FOR ME!!!!

Oh my gosh...seriously, I could kiss their feet.

I am a happy, happy girl once again.

You people rock.

Now...if I could just figure out how to access it...did I have an old password? How does this work?

Either way...I have it back. Now I just have to figure out what I'm going to do with it...

Sunday, March 25, 2007

Pertater Chippies

Whoa! Okay! After the depression that was that last blog post...let me blog about something happy.

Something like...

Potato Chips.

Seriously, due to the fact that they are the best invention in the whole wide world ever, potato chips are bound to make people happy. The mere phrase puts a smile on the lips of...well...everyone.

I have a problem with potato chips. That problem being I love them WAY too much. Seriously...if I could eat them at every meal...and then again for dessert...and a midnight snack...I would be the happiest woman alive. Most women are chocoholics. I'm a chipoholic. I can't get enough of them. My mom finally stopped having them around the house because A) they're not good, in fact, very bad for you and B) I can't keep my hands on them even when I try. So to spare me from an early potato chip induced death, she's begun buying Pringles.

(Actually, I'm not sure which is sadder. My obsession with these chips or the fact that I still live with my mother.)

But I digress...

My point is...

Potato Chips are really good. And I can't find a healthier substitute that will keep me as happy.

Pretzels? Please.

Popcorn? Meh.

Salt water? No thanks.

See? There's absolutely no replacement for this magnificent invention. NONE!

*sigh* But if I hope to keep my girlish figure and not...you know...rot out my insides...I best lay off of them until a special occasion, like...my birthday...that I'm not celebrating...

Ooh. Chips and Pop. Best day ever.

If you want a happy blog post, this one is not for you

I have a birthday next month.

I'm not disclosing the date because I've decided to forego the activities.

Birthdays are highly overrated. They're merely inconsequential days where you get to contemplate the fact that you are another year older (but not really wiser because if you were any wiser you would have kept your mouth shut about your birth date approaching.) The most depressing thing is that you get to do it again next year, only you'll be even OLDER than the year before and no matter how much you want to stop it, you can't. So, you just get older and older and older...until...you know....you don't get older anymore.

Wow. I had no idea I had such depressing ideas about the whole thing. But every birthday just reminds me that I'm no longer a "kid", I have to get on with "real life" and despite my protesting, things are in a constant state of change no matter how much I may want them to stay the same. Apparently, I've become hugely fatalistic over the past few months. But seriously...the whole cycle strikes me as a little morbid.

Friday, March 23, 2007

This one's for Loni

I am now allowing my blog to accept annonymous comments.

So, all you creepy lurkers out there who can't bring themselves to reveal their true identity may lurk no more. Your anonymity is important to me. Comment away... Loni.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Parade of Homes

I found my dream home this past weekend while in the Twin Cities.

My boy and I drove past it and before we even realized it was a Parade of Homes home, I was pointing out the window, poking him in the arm, and obstructing his vision while gasping, "Oh my gosh! Look at that! It's my dream home!"

So, imagine my surprise when we discovered it was on our list of must-see homes.

I walked in and honestly...I got a little week in the knees.

Floor to ceiling windows overlooking Lake Minnetonka, vaulted ceilings, dark-dark-DARK stained hardwood floors and walls painted in a warm white...

It was glorious.

It was my New England style home with a wide-open airy feeling, stark contrasts and windows upon windows upon windows. It had a four seasons porch (yesssss), a room that would make the PERFECT library, a glorious kitchen with black granite counter tops, a massive garage (which my boy apparently thinks he would need) and...get this...a flippin' basketball court. A BASKETBALL COURT! I don't need a basketball court, but it could easily be turned into a massive home theater. And we'd need to re-do the basement because it wasn't utilized quite as efficiently as it could have been. But other than that? It was GLORIOUS. Seriously. I haven't stopped talking about it since I got home.

But the very best part that made me majorly fall in love with this place?

NO WOOD. Okay, it had wood, but the wood didn't look like wood because of the dark stain. And this is a very good thing indeed because I HATE wood. I hate it. I don't know why, I just do. I think it's the ugliest, most horrid looking thing anyone can put in a house ever. EVER. But you can't really get by without having wood in a home so...you just disguise the wood to not look so woodish....It's BRILLIANT.

*sigh*

I even mentioned to my boy that if homes were things you could make out with, I'd be sucking face with this one.

Ahem.

If I had 2.6 Million Dollars, I'd be moving in tomorrow.

Oh....my....gosh

It's the first day of Spring.

And it's like forty degrees here.

Which makes it pretty much the best day ever.

Despite the gray, rainy, muddy mess.

It's still Spring.

SPRING, BABY.

The best season ever.

I'm so excited I could just about piddle.

In other news, I should take this opportunity to apologize for my slacker ways and never posting, never, ever, ever.

I suck.

And I'm sorry for that.

More later.

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

The Bestest Movie In the Whole Wide World Forever and Ever 'Til Death Do Us Part, Amen.

I used to have two favorite movies.

#1: "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?"

#2: "About a Boy"

They are no longer my two favorite movies.

They are now my second favorite movies.

Only because they have been replaced by...

THE BESTEST MOVIE IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD FOREVER AND EVER 'TIL DEATH DO US PART, AMEN.

If people could marry movies, I'd be hightailing it down the altar as we speak.

If people could wear movies, I'd never change my clothes ever, ever.

If people could eat movies, I'd become a professional glutton.

IT IS THAT GOOD.

I get a wonderful feeling of euphoria just thinking about it. I walk around telling myself "Life is good" now that I've seen it. My life has become a wonderful world full of happy rainbows and smiling butterflies and playful kittens and laughing, magical fairies that sprinkle their happy, smiling, playful, laughing, magical fairy dust on everyone wherever they go.

ALWAYS.

If this movie were a stuffed animal in a Hallmark store, I'd pick it up and say things like, "You're just the BESTEST wittul movie in the whole wide world, yes you are. Yes, you are!"

Um...

Yeah.

Ahem.

Now I'm just getting carried away.

It's not THAT good.

Wait, what am I saying?

It IS that good...it's just not good enough to respond to in such a flagrantly irrational and retarded way.

I suppose you wanna know what movie it is, huh?

"Stranger than Fiction."

It's glorious, I say.

GLORIOUS!

I'm sorry. I'm getting carried away again. It's just really good.

So...go watch it. Enjoy it. Revel in the movie making magic and make it your favorite forever and ever, amen.

Do it.

Or I will hurt you.

Note to Self...

After having suffered through girl problems the entire day and being unable to fall asleep due to afore mentioned girl problems...

I discovered that sprawling out on one's stomach and contorting one's head at an unusually un-human angle...

Not only makes you fall asleep...

But it also makes you forget the pain that is being a female.

Awesome.